Sugar-Detox Chocolate Banana Almond Butter Waffles (Paleo)

I am so pumped on life right now! I realize that my last post was very dramatic; I was very sad. But people are amazing. I was truly unsure if anyone would be willing to donate for Brave's medical bills. Or if they would just ignore it or think it was silly. I realize that many people can't afford their own medical care right now, let alone someone else's dog's. But hope is here! Thanks to some wonderful people, we've raised $315 already! Many other people have reached out to me by just talking to me about it and giving me ideas and encouragement. I so appreciate it all. I've had many tears of joy and gratitude. You can read Brave's update here: http://www.gofundme.com/33hbvk 

I'm also super pumped on linguistics and the history of the English language and the implications for teaching reading and writing. I've spent the last 2 days reading about this stuff to get my homewok done. And I'm actually reading these chapters beginning to end because I'm so fascinated. Did you know that some Bantu languages have over 10 tenses?! In english we just have 3, past, present, future. In Bantu languages there's verb changes(suffixes) to indicate today, yesterday, long ago, earlier today, right now, ongoing, consecutively, habitually, later, hypothetically, not yet and sometimes. Arabic and Hebrew only have consonants, vowel sounds are represented by diacritics, different squiggles above consonants. And the reason thief and thieves are spelled the way they are is that in Old English f and v both said /f/. Noah Webster successfully changed "re" to "er" (centre, center) for American English. He wanted to change "women" to "wimmen" and "pickle" to "pickel", but that was a no go. Fascinating, I know!                                                                   Birsh, J., (2005). Multisensory teaching of basic language skills. Balitomore, MD: Paul H. Brooks Publishing.
—Freeman, D. E., & Freeman, Y. S. (2004). Essential linguistics: What you need to know to teach reading, ESL, spelling, phonics, and grammar. Heinemann.

Selah will be here Monday! (imagine Oprah's voice here)

Reason # 4 that I'm pumped on life is that my sugar detox is going very well! I had headaches in the afternoon/evening the first 4 days. But that's gone. My taste buds have already changed so that a roasted sweet potato or tart Granny Smith tastes like candy. I'm making sure I'm eating a lot so I'm not hungry. Since Monday, I've had no grains, beans or sugars of any kind, except small portions of yams, green-tipped bananas and green apples.  Confession: today at Lucille's, I got pan-fried trout but the trout was lightly breaded! I ate it because I don't want to be that person. Sam's sugar detox is non-existent. I'm eyeing his empty pint of Ben and Jerry's right now. But I've got some kale chips and soon I'll have a spoonful of almond butter and a chug of almond milk. Cause that's what I do late at night. I made these waffles this morning and they came out pretty great for sugar detox waffles. If you're not into the sugar detox, I'd suggest subbing the 2T of almond milk with 2 T honey. You could also sub the raw coca nibs for chocolate chips. Otherwise, I think you'll love it. 

Sugar-Detox Chocolate Banana Almond Butter Waffles (Paleo)  Makes 3 waffles

Ingredients

½ cup almond flour

¼ cup coconut flour

½ teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon baking powder

1 Tablespoon cocoa powder

1/3 cup coconut oil

¼ cup smooth almond butter

4 eggs (pastured, organic) whisked

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

½ teaspoon almond extract

2 Tablespoons almond milk

1 small mashed banana

1-2 Tablespoons raw cocoa nibs

Directions

- Preheat your waffle iron (mine is set on 4).

- Mix the dry ingredients in a small bowl. Sift in the cocoa powder (or it'll clump).

- Mix the wet ingredients in a large bowl (Save cocoa nibs for the end).

- Combine wet and dry ingredients and mix well. Let sit for 2 minutes.

- Add cocoa nibs and mix one last time.

- Add about 1/2 cup of batter to the center of the waffle turn, close, flip and let it cook. 

I toped mine with melted Chocolate Coconut Almond Butter. I made this with a little bit of left over coconut butter, some almond butter and a bit of cocoa powder in the food processor. Sam had maple syrup : )

Braveheart

I took Braveheart to the vet yesterday. He needs some serious medical care that I cannot afford. I looked into pet insurance, but it's too late since nothing will cover his pre-existing condition. All last night and this morning I was tormented by the idea of just letting him die. So I'm gonna try to raise money for his liver ultrasound and treatment.  Check it out here: http://www.gofundme.com/33hbvk

Here's his story:


         In March, Brave was huddled on some rocks, in Harvey Park pond as we walked by. He was so motionless, I barely noticed him. He was completely unresponsive as I approached and pet him. When I used a belt for a leash, he stood up and tried to climb over the rocks, unsuccessfully. I scooped him up and over. Slowly but surely he followed us home. He was terribly malnourished and skinny with a bald tail. He spent the first 3 days sleeping or gazing sadly around with his big unsure eyes. I posted a found dog on Petfinder and checked lost dog ads. Because of the condition we fund him in, collar-less, worn elbow and knee skin, long cracked nails and starving, he seemed to be abandoned. His cowering response to accidental bumps or loud voices indicate that he was not treated well in his former life. 

               He quickly started eating and drinking and even gained some weight. He was coming back to life. I distinctly remember the first time he howled joyfully as I arrived home from work. He still does this, howling like a seal and spinning in circles when he's happy. Initially we planned on finding him a home among friends, since our house seemed full with Charlie and 2 cats. But now, he's part of our family. Those who have met him know how sweet and loving he is, with his puppy face and loyal eyes. He's now attached to my heels. 
             The vet estimates him to be 5 years old. His initial visit to Maxfund Pet Clinic told us his liver was in bad shape. As the liver is an amazing regenerating organ, we hoped that with a quality diet and supplements he would recover. It's 3 months later and while Brave has improved, he is still very sick. 
              His vet, at Hampden Family Pet Hospital, analyzed his blood work and took x-rays to check for any masses in his abdomen. Nothing worrisome showed up on the x-rays, but his blood work showed severe malfunction in his liver. The vet explained that the next step is a liver ultrasound to rule out cancer of the liver and identify the cause of his liver dysfunction. I have yet to schedule this appointment. I want to give Brave a 2nd chance at life, despite the fact that we can't afford the vet bills. We've already spent over $600 on veterinary bills. The cost of the liver ultrasound is 350$ plus the treatment that would follow. 
              It pains me to ask for money but it's far better than the alternative. Any little bit will help. If you are willing to donate anything to Brave's second chance at life we would be eternally grateful.

Egg Wrapped Breakfast Burritos

Summer is here! There's so much I want to write about, I don't know where to start. School ended last week in a flurry of sadness, excitement and chaos. Oh, I will miss those kids. I might see some today though, at the library. I worked until 11pm Friday night, getting my grad school work done, so we could go away for the weekend. I will post about that later. It took me a whole day to decompress from the emotional, stressful tornado of that week. And then it hit me. I'm on summer break. When I wake up Tuesday, I have nothing to do. Except fix that flat tire. And unpack and maybe clean. 
When people ask me what I'm going to do for my summer, I love saying "Whatever I want!"
I made a list of summer things this morning. Like go fishing, replace the gutters, clean out the closets, wash the dogs, the usual. There's some things on the calendar. But whatever I want is what will go down. Living in my stretchy pants. And I get a paycheck each month. It's a glorious feeling. 

Remember that list of posts I said I would post soon? No? That's good, 'cause it didn't happen. Here's  a quick run down. I'm working on the Chocolate Coconut Cake pops. I tried to duplicate my mistakes that turned into those cake pops once so far. No go. As for the Spartan race, it was freezing, I almost died. Brave is a dog we found 3 months ago. I planned on finding him a home. He is now mine. I love him but he is sick. He's going to the vet today. I'll let you know. 

Oh First Graders: Here's some of my favorite out-of-context quotes from this year:
"This is my best life eveerrr!"
"This is where you lock your dogs, but I have an elephant inside." (Talking about a kennel)
"It's like little marbles, 'cept it's more bigger." (Describing marbles)
"I had a dream about you. We were eating all the cupcakes in the office!" hysterical laughter
"I think the tooth fairy's not real, 'cause she didn't give me my money."
"No I don't have 5 dollars! I just have a 5-dollar bill."
"I think we're broke. But I'm not gonna save it. I'm just gonna spend it. Guess where? Toys R Us." 
"If a polar bear sticks it's tongue to the north pole, it will stick!"
"When we wake up and when we wake up again, it will be Friday."
Me: "Stop wasting learning time." Him: "Yeah, time is money!"
“Yeah, you can tell he’s getting old, he looks all old and sweaty.”
“That makes us shirt brothers!” (They're wearing the same shirt)
"What is this and how did it get in my eye?!" indigently, looking at the eyelash I just got out of her eye.

Since it's summer, we're doing a 21 day sugar detox. The amount of ice cream and such I consumed during the last month of school was out of hand. Ever since I went to Tom and Annah Borak's nutrition seminar in the fall, I've been changing the way I eat. During my 30 day no-grain, no-cane sugar trial, I learned how much better my body feels on a primal diet. Then life got stressful. And stress leads me to the comforting bosom of sugar. So sugar detox, here we go! I'm altering it slightly since we don't eat meat and will be climbing and crossfitting. In order to survive this I will be making these today and other sugar detox recipes from Paleomg.

Sam's gonna do this with me. Probably. He doesn't like eating first thing in the morning, so sometimes I make him breakfast burritos to-go with gluten free wraps. But he's eliminating grains as part of this experiment. So here's a genius idea: egg-wrapped breakfast burritos!


Egg Wrapped Green Chili Yam Breakfast Burrito Recipe
Makes 2 burritos with some leftover filling

Ingredients:
1 small yam/sweet potato, cut into very 
   small slivers or cubes
1/2 small onion, chopped
1/2 jalapeno, diced
1 (4 oz.) can fire-roasted diced green   
   chilies
2 cups organic spinach
1-2 Tablespoons coconut oil
Sea salt & pepper

6 organic pastured eggs, scrambled with a dash of almond milk (optional)

3 oz. organic white cheddar cheese, sliced (optional)
1/2 avocado

Aluminum foil and waxed paper. I think the egg might stick funny to the foil, so I top it with waxed paper. 

Directions:
Make filling: 
- Heat coconut oil on medium in a large pan. Add sweet potato and stir to coat with oil.  - Cover (they cook faster) and cook, stirring occasionally, for 4-5 minutes. 
- Add onion and jalapeno and cook for 3-5 minutes more.
- Add spinach and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Stir. Turn heat down to low and cover to wilt spinach. 

Make egg wraps: 
- Heat some coconut oil in a pan on medium low. Pour in half the scrambled eggs and 
  gently spread so they cover the pan with the size of the wrap you want. Cook 2-5 
  minutes, until edges are set.
- Carefully flip the egg wrap like a pancake, and cook 2-3 minutes more. 
- Layer aluminum foil and waxed paper. Lay Egg wrap on top and pile on the filling. 
  Top with cheese and avocado. Roll up gently and take it to go.

Cheers!

Mother's Day Cake (Vegan)

So I hear my blog is pretty popular with the moms. And by the moms I mean my mom, Sam's mom and my friends, Kevin's mom and Jay's mom. So yea, it's popular with the moms.

To to all these moms and more Happy Mother's Day!
Mom's are pretty special. This cake is for you. It's two two vanilla cakes & one rich chocolate cake layered with vegan vanilla cream, berries and cream cheese frosting. I will present it to my mom later tonight. She will love it. She loves baking, cooking and desserts just as much as I do. Or rather, I should say I get it from her. Also, she loves everything I do, because she's my mom.

Mom, thanks for loving me so dearly even though I'm such a brat! You're the best!

I'll update this post later with the recipe. (It's here! Keep scrolling)
Right now, I need to clean my wrecked kitchen and myself so I can go see my second mom, Cindy Kay. Sam's mom has loved and cared for me since I was 17. Plus, she raised my best friend. And did an amazing job, because he's amazing. Mama CK, I love you!

Tips: Take the time to line the cake pan with parchment paper in the bottom and grease with coconut oil and lightly dust with flour. If you don't,  your cake will fall apart as it comes out. If you have time, make the vanilla cream the night before and keep it in the fridge to set up. Always sift cocoa powder. I don't sift anything else, even when recipes call for it. I don't have time for that. But I do it with cocoa powder. Finally, be prepared- this cake takes me a couple hours. 

Vegan Chocolate Cake Recipe (This is my cupcake recipe halved to make just 1 layer of cake. For the best chocolate cupcakes, double this recipe.)

1/2 Cup almond milk
1/2 teaspoon apple cider vinegar (white wine vinegar will work in a pinch)
1/4 cup coconut oil, melted
1/4 cup organic cane sugar
1/2 Tablespoon vanilla
1/2 teaspoon teaspoon almond extract (optional)
1/2 cup flour
1/4 cup high quality cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon sea salt

- Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 9-inch round cake pan with parchment paper in the   
  bottom and grease with coconut oil and lightly dust with flour. 
- Whisk together almond milk and vinegar and set aside to curdle. 
- In a small bowl sift in cocoa powder and mix dry ingredients.
- In a large bowl mix together oil, sugar, vanilla, almond and milk mixture.
- Add dry ingredients and mix well until no large lumps remain. 
- Pour into the cake pan and spread around evenly. Bake at 350 for 18-25 minutes, until 
   toothpick inserted comes out clean. 

- Cool on a wire rack for 20-30 minutes, then invert onto the rack. Allow cake to 

  continue to cool outside of the pan. 

Vegan Vanilla Cake Recipe
1 Cup almond milk
1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
1  1/4 Cups white wheat flour
2 Tablespoons corn starch (or potato starch)
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup Earth Balance spread
3/4 Cup organic cane sugar
1  1/2 Tablespoons vanilla
1/4 teaspoon almond extract (optional)

- Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line 2 9-inch round cake pan with parchment paper in the   

  bottom and grease with coconut oil and lightly dust with flour. 

- Whisk together almond milk and vinegar and set aside to curdle. 

- In a small bowl, mix together dry ingredients

- In a large bowl, cream together sugar and Earth Balance until light and fluffy, about 2   

  minutes, stopping to scrape the sides of the bowl a few times (Us a hand held mixer or your 
  muscles).

- Beat in milk mixture, vanilla and almond until well combined.

- Add dry ingredients and mix until no large lumps remain. (Don't over mix)

- Divide batter evenly into 2 round cake pans and spread evenly. Bake at 350 for 18-25  
  minutes, until toothpick inserted comes out clean. 

- Cool on a wire rack for 20-30 minutes, then invert onto a wire cooling rack. Allow cake to 

  continue to cool outside of the pan. 

Vegan Vanilla Cream Recipe (Adapted from Babycakes)

1/2 Cup almond milk

2 Tablespoons vanilla

1/2 Cup soymilk powder

2 Tablespoon coconut flour

1/4 Cup agave nectar

1/4 cup powdered sugar (or more agave, but I think it helps the texture)
3/4 Cup coconut oil, melted

1 - 2 teaspoons lemon juice

- In a food processor process everything except the coconut oil and lemon juice for 2 minutes. 

- With the processor running, slowly add melted coconut oil and lemon juice and process for 1-2 minutes more.

- Store in a sealed container in the freezer for 2 hours, or in the fridge for 8+ hours to set.

Vegan Cream Cheese Frosting Recipe

1/2 Cup vegan cream cheese (I prefer Tofutti)

1/2 Cup Earth Balance spread

2 Cups powdered sugar

2 teaspoons vanilla

1 teaspoon lemon zest

- Cream together cream cheese and buttery spread until light and fluffy.

- Add powdered sugar in 1/2 cup batches and beat until fluffy, about 3-4 minutes.

- Add vanilla and lemon and beat 2 minutes more.

- Keep in an airtight container in the fridge until ready to use. 

Fresh Berries- any combination of strawberries, black berries, raspberries & blueberries

Assembly:

- Layer 1 vanilla cake on the base. Spread 
   liberally with 1/2 of the vanilla cream. 
- Build a little "wall" of vanilla cream around 
  the rim to contain the berries and help hold 
  the cakes together. Gently press a layer of 
  berries into the vanilla cream.

- Top with the chocolate cake and repeat   
  with vanilla cream and berries. 

- Top with the final vanilla cake. 

- Use the cream cheese frosting to frost the   
  top and sides of the cake (A turntable and a good frosting spatula really helps)

- Decorate the top with fresh berries. You could also drizzle with chocolate or dip the  
   strawberries in chocolate. 

- Dont' drop it!

Now share it with your mom! (other people are ok, too)

p.s. In trying to make a Primal version of this cake that same morning, I ended up creating a Paleo caramel cake that I plan on doing something wonderful with later this week. Maybe when I have an opportunity to share with people who'll appreciate some Paleo dessert.